Welcome Back & The Announcement!

I know that my posting hasn't been worth ish. Access to internet is limited and to be perfectly honest.....sometimes after working on a computer for 8+ hours a day, I really don't feel like getting on one at home. But I am back and will be posting more regularly. So on to the announcement.....

I am 12 weeks pregnant!!!! It was a shock to both Jay and I, but why it was such a shock is beyond me lol. I've been off birth control for health reasons since October 2011. The rhythm method was working so well that I think we forgot that that mess wasn't foolproof. So I'm going to be a mommy! My first thought was "Noooo.....I'm too young!!!" Then I realized that I am going to turn 29 in August. I'm really running out of time to have pregnancies that aren't high risk ones. When I saw that positive Clear Blue Easy, I really just panicked. No other way to say it. I always try to schedule things where they go into their perfect place. Kids was supposed to come only after the career get on track and most importantly after marriage. Welp! Change in plans. Every day that passes, the more excited I become about bringing life into the world. The great part about it is that I have a loving partner that will be there every step of the way! So let's have a drink to me (well y'all drink and I'll watch). This blog will turn into a journal of my pregnancy with posts, rants, random commentary and pictures throughout the way!!

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Time Flies.....

February 9th marked me and Boo Thang's 5th anniversary. WOW! It doesn't even seem like it's been that long at all. I guess they say time flies when you are having fun. We have had our share of ups and downs, but we are still going strong.

We spent this whole weekend holed up at the Marriott (thank God for employee perks!) just enjoying each other's company, staying warm, being BY OURSELVES, and catching up on much needed rest. Sometimes I think I am making him old. We even stayed up all night jamming to Whitney Houston songs (that is a whole other post). I surprised him with a romantic setup that almost made him cry. That means the world to me.

I can't wait for the rest of our story to unfold. I'm still excited when I see him. He still gives me goosebumps when we kiss. I love him. I truly do.

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30 Day Music Challenge: Day 23 - A Song That You Want To Play At Your Wedding

My Latest Greatest Inspiration - Teddy Pendergrass

I know this sounds very "The Wood" of me to want this song played at my wedding, lol. The first time that I ever remember hearing this song was when I heard first saw this movie. However, this song has special meaning for me and Boo Thang. This song was playing while we were expressing the deepest of our real feelings for each other for the very first time. It was the moment that we decided to look at our own happiness and let our respective toxic relationships go and get together. Every time I hear it, I smile.

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30 Day Music Challenge: Day 21 - A Song You Listen To When You're Happy

Good Life - Kanye West f. T-Pain

How can you not cheer up when you hear this song?! It always puts me in a good place mentally. I may not be living my ultimate version of the good life, but I have life. That in itself is a happy day.

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30 Day Music Challenge: Day 15 - A Song That Describes You

Diva - Beyonce

This song has been my unofficial theme song from the moment I bought I Am...Sasha Fierce and gave it a listen. Whenever I'm feeling myself and am getting ready, I cue it up to put me in the optimum frame of mind. My Twitter name has diva in it. My blog title has diva in it. I consider myself to be a leading lady in the way that I carry myself and the way I am taking charge of my life.

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Turning The Corner

Today I had an interview at Comcast for a Retention Executive position. Pending a drug test and a background check……I GOT A JOB!!!! My start date is November 14th and I couldn't be happier. I got 2 whole weeks to bring my wardrobe back to professional standards (and clothes that fit properly). *happy screams* 

The interviewer….he was amazing. He sat down at the beginning of the interview and told me, "I've seen your resume and I'm impressed. Right now I already want to recommend to HR to hire you….so it's up to you to blow the interview." Wow. This put me in the most relaxed position EVER. After all the questions, he just kept saying "great" and "brilliant." Made me feel great. AND he got cool points with me for not dismissing me on sight because of my juris doctor. I thought I had applied to this job with a resume that took this off. Apparently not. When he said,"so I see you have a law degree," I immediately went OH SHIT in my head. But it was nothing to him….thank God!

I'm just happy that it went so well. The first person I called was my Dad.....can you believe that, lol? I can finally start getting my credit on track. In fact….I'm getting a copy of my credit report sent out to me as I type so I can see the damage. I am one of those awful people that slides it under the rug because there was nothing I could do about it. I can finally bring my student loans current and start saving. More importantly, Boo Thang and I are finally a two income relationship. He just got a promotion (after being there 2 months…what!!). We can finally move out of his mom's house and start wedding planning.  *sighs* All is right with the world.

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First Steps

I have moved!!! YES!!!!

The past month has been a flurry of packing, moving and getting things in order to move. I intentionally stopped blogging so that I can get into a less busy head space. I am officially a resident of Madison County….and that feels pretty good. Around my last couple of days left in Oxford, I realized  that I have lived in Oxford for the past 10 years. I moved into Crosby Hall at Ole Miss on June 27, 2001. That was the beginning of the second summer session before my freshman year. I never left. Something about Oxford connected with me. I guess that was because my hometown is the size of a small village. Anything that was a little bigger was better for me. Went to undergrad there. Went to law school there. Then started spinning my wheels there. Great town for a student…..not that great for anyone else there.

I've been here almost 3 weeks and it is still kinda weird to call anywhere else home. These are familiar surroundings but I've only visited. I am still trying to get out and bump around to make myself more at home. The job search has also began. I may have a job next week….but that is the subject for another post if and when I get the job.

There is also a change with Boo Thang and I. Over the past few days, he has been the most affectionate guy. I have the urge to just reach out and ask him what he did, lol. He's excited that he got to take me home with him. Can't be mad at that. We were stuck in a little rut and the change of scenery has done us good….in 3 weeks lol. 

HOWEVER (and what is a happy post without a "but") I am SO ready to move, lol. We are staying with Boo Thang's mother and stepdad until we save enough money to move out. I feel like that we have instantly stepped into the role of children. I love his mother to death, but it is so obvious that the absence of children has her happy that we are there. I don't have any problems, but Boo Thang is seriously annoyed. When he's annoyed, I'm annoyed. (It just happens like that sometimes.) I haven't lived at home with my parents for more than a summer in the past ten years, so I understand how much of a culture shock this is for him. All the more reason to get on up, get it together and move on out. It's going to work itself out though....or y'all will hear about it. 

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From Trash To Treasure

Psalm 139:14 NIV: "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

I have been craving a better spiritual connection and relationship with God. I have had many hangups about the church, but I am learning to let those go. I know that the journey begins and ends with me taking the steps.

I started a devotional bible reading plan on YouVersion.com. I love this website because it has a bible app for my Blackberry and allows me to make notes, bookmark verses and keeping up with my daily readings no matter where I am. Today's bible verse is the Psalm I quoted above and the topic was "from trash to treasure." The devotional centered around a piece of old worn out furniture that the author was trying to restore.

You, Lord, have the capability of undoing all my blemishes and mistakes, of taking me back to bare wood again. Better still, You are able to take my gouges and stains--my flaws--and rub and polish them until they're really the prettiest areas on the desk!
You have done this in my life so many times. I show up in Your garage a mess, but You always see the potential. I wonder if You heave a sigh and, with great determination, begin the project?
That I don't know. One thing I do know: that You are working; that You are the epitome of patience; that You are skilled--the very best--at refinishing sorry things that might be on the curb ready for the trash truck.
How can I ever thank You for what You have done for me? I can't. It's impossible. But You know my thoughts, my heart, the depth of my gratitude. And You see my potential.

There have been too many times that I have felt unworthy, unliked, unloved. I felt that way as I read this devotional. I think that I haven't ever felt truly comfortable in churches that I have gone to based on the fact that I felt "blemished." I know that He is bigger than man and will take me flaws and all. If he can works with my flaws and blemishes....maybe I can begin to work with myself in spite of those. I have always dreamed of a picture perfect life for myself. I had everything going in the correct order....but life is not that simple and easy. I have not been able to get past what I feel like are failures and actually live. I have accepted that none of this is a mistake and the things that I am experiencing now are for my benefit. I should not EVER doubt myself again.....because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

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Happy February Black Girl Day from Southern Legal Diva

Happy Black Girl Day, readers!! It's that time of the month that I celebrate being....well a happy black girl. Just in case you have missed some of my earlier celebrations, get caught up on the meaning here. I will continue to do this until Sister Toldja's holiday catches on.

Today I am a happy black girl because......[drum roll please] TODAY IS MY ANNIVERSARY!!!! The boyfriend and I have been together 4 years today. It was on this day that we stopped 6 months of pretending that we had no emotional attachment and sexual attraction to other because we were both holding on to bad relationships. Call it cheesy, but he is my best friend, my lover, my road dog, my confidante.....just a whole lot wrapped into to one guy. It scares me sometimes how much we are like two brains in one body. Love has me happy today! We had anniversary plans tonight. Then 6 inches of snow and COUNTING has fallen out of the sky since noon today.....needless to say we are snowed in (It's Mississippi....yes we are snowed in). And I'm sick, lol. So we will have a makeup celebration on Valentine's Day since it's fast approaching! I love love!

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Day 17: What is Your Favorite Genre of Movies?

My favorite genre of movies has to be the romantic comedy. I am a sucker for sappy love stuff. I also love comedy, so mixing the two together....instant win! The race of the cast members doesn't matter to me either way. I watch them all from Brown Sugar to My Best Friend's Wedding (..two of my favorite movies).

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Day 9: Best Day Of Your Life

(Here I am again with the procrastination!! Fixing it now!)

The best day of my life was May 10, 2008. This is the day that I graduated from law school. Law school is the most challenging thing that I have ever done and to finish with my juris doctor is the proudest moment of my life. I knew that I wanted to be a lawyer from the time I was in the 11th grade. Took a lot of twists and turns until I got to law school but I made it. I can't remember feeling more accomplished than at this moment.

See!!! Cheesing all the way down the processional. Happiness was the word!

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Starting 2011 With A Bang

Happy New Year!!! I know it's late but it's better late than never, lol. Every time that I start to blog something keeps holding me back. I don't want this to be a part time thing...so I am urging myself to do better lol.

Most people start off every year with a list of New Year's resolutions. I can't with a straight face do that anymore. I tend to break everything that I call a resolution. That being said, I have a list of workable goals that I want to accomplish throughout the year 2011 and beyond. This list is as follows:

1. Pass the Mississippi Bar Exam. This has got to happen THIS YEAR. If it doesn't then my whole law school experience has been in vain. I have been consistently close to passing, but no dice. I have to be a fully licensed attorney or I feel like I will stuck in mediocrity. I know that it has been said that you can get any job you want with a law degree.....but this is total bullshit. In today's economy, the only thing a law degree does is scare regular employers off because they don't want to pay you what you are really worth. So by April, I hope to be flashing my bar card.
2. To get a job that doesn't have me living paycheck to paycheck. I am 27 with no kids. Why in the hell am I just barely getting by? I am not living beyond my means. I gave up shopping for the most part and am only splurging rarely. Much more than the amount of money I make, I need a job that makes me feel fulfilled. I think that #1 will help out with this. I also need a job with benefits and I need job security. I've been laid off. That shit is not cute.
3. To lose weight gradually. My goal is to get down to about 140 pounds. Since I have started my weight loss journey, I have lost about 5 of those, lol. I want to be a healthier, better me. It has nothing to do with what I look like. I think I am a pretty young thing already....I just want to enhance what I have. I also need to fix things before they get out of hand. I don't want diabetes, heart disease, or anything of the like to get me.
4. To read more. I have always had an amazing love of books. Seems like being in law school pushed that to the side with the nearly 400 pages of assignment material every two days. I would love to make the time to read more and get that back.
5. To blog more. Today is the first step. My blog throughout the years has always been more personal than informational. It has been like my public diary. Because I haven't been doing this, I have been holding a lot of stuff in.....leading me to stress more.
6. To go to church regularly. The Sunday after Christmas was my first time setting foot in a church since September. I know that's probably terrible. I have not been able to find what I am looking for when I go to church. Sermons at the church I used to go to are always focused on some particular person inside. They are homophobic and way out of touch with the real world. I am seriously going to find me a church home for 2011 and start to get closer to God.
7. To move away FAR AWAY from Oxford. I love Oxford. I have lived here on my own for 6 years. All of my best memories were made here. BUT it is time to go experience something different. I am SO ready to leave here. I want to come back and visit and I ultimately want to own rental property here. Living here has been a crutch to me because family is so close. I need to really strike out and do this thing by myself.

So those are my goals. I most likely am going to add to this list between now and December 31st. What are your goals? What are you working on this year?

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